We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize