I hate all girls vehemently.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
