ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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