Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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