remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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