Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(607): View more from New York

Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.

(1-607): View more from New York

I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.

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(540): View more from Virginia

the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.

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(302): View more from Delaware

I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(715): View more from Wisconsin

not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"

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(845): View more from New York

alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.

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(703): View more from Virginia

high in an attic. pig roast in 10.

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(989): View more from Michigan

You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.

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(806): View more from Texas

I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.

(940): View more from Texas

I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?

(806): View more from Texas

LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.

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