Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I could fuck to npr.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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