people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Ketchup is God's man juice
This house was built for laser tag.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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