i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
