Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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