We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize