Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize