I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
