found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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