You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
