Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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