I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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