I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
found the other keg... it's in the tree
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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