Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
