So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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