i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
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