Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pole danced in your parka.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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