Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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