Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
