Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
