It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
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