i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
