Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize