I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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