I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
