your thong is hanging out like whoa
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
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The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
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somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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