She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
