I need to stop coming to work sober
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize