I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
