your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Randomize