NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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