:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
