i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
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