hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize