Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
