The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
