This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize