I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
This is my gift to your gina
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Randomize
