hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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