i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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