Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize