just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
He kissed a someone with a penis
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
