She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
i love accidental penises.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
No more Irish car bombs ever.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Randomize
