Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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