Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Green mimosas i think yes
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
