In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
