i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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